I'm so perky now... at 2:00AM! After dinner at Rai-Rai Ken with my lola, mom and bro, I bought an Infocom prepaid card for a hundred bucks... guess wat? I'm really enjoying these free hours from 12AM to 7AM... weeee... forgive me peeps, I just feel as if I've won the lottery...

I just finished designing one of the posters... wanted to make the second one, but my eyes have ran out of "taste", so have to do some other stuff and then back to work. I don't plan to sleep the whole night anyway... with this 7 hour access, there's no way I'm taking a break.

Read my previous post, I'm sure it drained much of your energy... sorry po, but just wanted to answer the questions "profoundly" as how Van put it. I left out something though, something important.

Before that, ika ilang HT na ba yan? hehe joke lang. As to the vice, I think I have an idea... hmmm... he keeps on... playing video games???... if that's it then I tell you I have this friend nga they split up because of video games!!! Ang babaw talaga!

As to the thing I left out, here it is. What's your understanding of that fear you said about breaking the bond if you go beyond friendship? Is it really a fear, or is it just the way things are still in your life? It's good that you noted that fear thing. It's true that sometimes we tend to take things to the next level only to find out that somehow everything we worked hard for gets lost in the process. I don't think it's fear, Van. Only you would know what you are capable of and what you are not capable of yet.

And here's something about guys... hehe. Maybe your HT is the kind of guy I'm reffering to here. With your kind of person, I'm pretty sure your HT belongs to the "pedigree" type, if you know what I mean... yung hindi askal... hehe. IF, that is, IF I were to assume na may gusto siya sa 'yo, I think what's happening to both of you now is also what my simulated program of the whole situation will project. The pieces of the puzzle fits. He doesn't have commitment issues. He just has issues on committing NOW. He's just that kind of guy who won't make a move until he's sure that he can handle a relationship in general. Being sigurista is different, because a sigurista moves only if he/she knows that the other party likes him/her. I know you can work the "fears" and differences out eventually, so no need to worry about that... But I ask you Van, if you were in his shoes, would you like to start a relationship already facing a problem or an uncertainty? Only you can answer that.

I'll show you an example of how different it is if problems arise before "WE" and after "WE". Most karaan Insik are not allowed to have a BF/GF who is of the same family name as the person. I give you a situation that involves me and I'll show you how my mind worked at that time. Alam mo, because of this, dami ko nang secrets nailabas 'coz I can't think of a better real-life example that can show a guy's POV... I hope this is worth it, pero sige na lang, I wanna rid off my secrets anyway, except the DARK ones... mwahahaha... if ever there are.

I think you know of Michelle Lim... do you?.. oo na.. si #1... #1 dati. Pareho kami... Lim. During the time where my eyes still sparkle for her (drama), I didn't know whether I'm allowed to court someone of the same family name. I didn't even know if mom was okay with the idea of me having a GF at my age. During that time, I'd deny my feelings, so that I won't do anything that might lead on to something forbidden. So whenever the Pharma peeps teased us, wala lang... cool lang ako. There was even once that I said something bad about Michelle just to prove that what they're teasing me is false. I'm so BAAAAD!!! With my reaction, obvious na bata pa ako noon... bata pa rin ngayon... hehehe. But I took it back eventually and had to eat my own words. It didn't taste good at all. *spit. And then there was one night na di ko talaga matiis, so I asked my mom that "If ever magka GF ako, pwede ba same family name". Of course mom asked why, and then I said, "Wala lang. Ask lang ko for precautionary measures." Liar! And then since yun na ang naging topic, todo ko na ring tinanong "Ma, kung Filipina, ok lang ba?" I think I pushed it too far this time... and it took mom a long while to answer me. I guess she grilled me with around 10 questions plus, before she gave me an answer of "Pwede, as long as mabait, because I'd rather a nice Filipina girl than a Chinese one who will give headaches to you." Aba, concerned... Naks naman! Sarap ng tulog ko nang gabing yun. It felt as if I gained an extra pair of lungs. After that night, if you knew me then, you'd probably see me frequently passing through the Pharma area to take a short "silip". There was even one time I allowed my friend to make me deliver something all the way t the Chem department. I was never the person who'd allow someone to boss me around, but somehow I gave in just to be able to pass by Pharma since it happens to be on the way to Chem dept.

See Van, my example was one that shows that maybe he still has issues about himself, relationships, time management, etc. that he still has to decide for himself. Truthfully, I still can't resolve my issues regarding landline phones. I can't picture myself calling my GF in the night to talk like those 7-hour chats till 4AM. Still a no no!