A Blessed Christmas to one and all!!!

An update... finally!

Attended so many Christmas parties in the past two weeks.  I had a lot of fun in our CompE Christmas Party at Casbah Sheesha Bar in Rivergate.  The food was very bland but I enjoyed the company of my batchmates and I enjoyed watching them play in the games and dancing their heart out during the disco that followed afterwards.  I didn't stay too long in the party venue since some of our friends wanted to have coffee.  So we drove off to Bo's Banilad to have coffee and then went to Burger Joint (just beside Bo's) to have some burgers.  Rodney dropped me off at home since we just live in the same village.  It was one fun-filled night.

I also attended our Christmas Party at Lexmark which was held a day after our CompE party.  We had it at the 11th floor of Keppel building.  The food was great.  We had LECHON!  I enjoyed the games during the party.  Our team won!!! hehehehe.  We then had exchanging of gifts.  Our party ended sometime 9PM.  After the party, some of my officemates invited me to join in their "gimik".  We went to Vudu to dance and then went to Wah for a drinking spree. hehehe.  I just had clean fun with them.  We enjoyed the conversation there and I got to know more about them.  It was nice to know more about my officemates because I also got to let them know more about me and I also got to know more about myself.

Saturday, met up with Leslie at La Maison.  Les, I'm glad that you're finally back here in Cebu.  Nice to know that my friends (you and Walter) are now back in Cebu from your training.  Manila is just so far away for friends to keep communicating.  I'm glad that you're all back here.  Thank you very much for that talk that we had with Joy and Walter.  I appreciate you very much for your concerns and for the advices you've given to me and I'm happy that I have friends like you who still care and who put up with me in times like these.  I know that things in my life will be better in the months to come and I'm also very much looking forward to it.  I don't want to dwell long in this condition because I'm dead tired of it already and I know I'm strong enough to pick myself up and go on with my life.  Don't worry, just as I've made you part of my dark moments, I will also likewise share with you, with greater intensity, the happiness and blessings that God will offer to me as the times will come along.   That's a promise I will keep for the great debt of gratitude I owe to wonderful friends like you, Walter and Joy.  This comes sincerely from my heart, domo arigato gozaimashita!

It's been quite some time since the last time I wrote something here.

I just came from watching the movie Polar Express with my family (mom and bro). T'was a touching story and though I've been having difficulty accepting the fact that Christmas and all the jolly spirit that accompanies it is actually less than a month away, I could say that it was a miracle in itself that I watched this movie. I like stories like this where it makes me realize how precious time is and how important little things are. I guess when we age, we forget our dreams and we forget how it felt like to be a child a few years back then. We forget to see the little things and even if we do, we don't value them as much.

If you peeps saw the movie already, then you perhaps would know what I'm blogging about. The most interesting part of the movie (for me) was towards the end --- when the kids were able to listen to the jingle of the bell, and yet their parents weren't able to. I was in deep thought then... I could say I'm one with the parents. If I had been a cast of the movie, I'd be one of those who couldn't hear the melody of Santa's Bell.

When I was watching the movie, I felt like a kid. I was amazed by the elves, the gifts and Santa's factory. It made me a child once more. Yet when the movie was over, I mumbled "And now, back to reality..." Hehehe... I've stopped believing in fairytales and though how I wish I could, so many things in my life have led me to get in touch with what's real. I've stopped believing in Christmas. I've stopped believing in Santa Clause and I've stopped believing in tooth fairies. I could recall a few months ago that two of you who visit my site told me to still believe no matter what. I did listen to you, but now I've decided to be the bamboo that goes with the flow. Done and gone are the days when I have questions left unanswered. I already have them. And gone too were the times that I'd fight my battles and even other's battles if they were too weary to fight their own. I've stopped believing because there's no reason to go on with this thign I've been holding on to for the last 2 months. Struggles are fought when the cause is right, but without a cause, there is no banner left to raise.

It's over. And to hoping, I leave it up to the Lord because not even my desperate and endless attempts could overcome the destiny He has for me. I'm no longer the master of things but the slave to His plan. The warrior has been humbled and the battle left to those who have not fallen. Hello Hades.

Things will be very different about me in the next... I don't know what measure of time to use. The issue is closed. If friends can't change things, if I myself can't change things then there's only one conclusion to it -- It cannot be changed. So I guess this is it. Gotta be strong, gotta keep moving and gotta find my way in the road of life. Destiny holds me and only time know where I will be.

Patio ECILA - my newfound place at Ayala Center Cebu mall where I enjoy coffee and live acoustic music during my stays at the mall.  I enjoy the place very much because their coffee tastes so good.  I'm already a "suki" there and all I need to do is to is make a hand gesture before taking a seat and after a few minutes, a cup of brewed coffee already mixed with creamer and 2 packs of sugar is served right infront of me.  And during my stays in the evenings, there's this musician who plays nice acoustic music using his guitar... simply soothing and enjoyable.  If you peeps happen to pass by the place, pay it a visit.  It's just right beside Starbucks  It's really a nice place worth the visit.

November 15:  Exactly one year ago, Leslie introduced me to Rouselle and today marks one year of our friendship.  I checked my archives and I recall how things are different now from a year ago.  So much had happened and emotions went erratic rising and falling at various magnitudes.  I spent Monday afternoon at Starbucks... perhaps hoping that she'd pay the place a visit since it was at Starbucks where we met and had our first interesting conversation that brought us from friends to more than friends then to.... God knows how to describe this current situation of ours.  People went in and out of the coffeeshop, but no sight of her.  Just saw Maybelle Ngo and Masi (Mercy from Pharma).  After a few hours at Starbucks, I left and went around the mall.  Bumped into Yvette and her friend Joy.  We then went around the mall for a while looking for Sun cellular load and then coffee na naman at Cafe ECILA.  Afterwards, I went back to watch our store and then...

...at 8:43, an unexpected text came to my phone.  Unexpected because after such a long time of no communication, Rouselle texted me this: "Save a space for me in ur heart & not in ur mind.  The mind easily forgets but the heart always remembers.  Like now, I remember u & that's from my heart.  Hapy aniversary dear fren! 1 yr. Nata amigo!u"

It made me happy that she remembered, so I gave her a call and we talked stuff... usual stuff we talk about like telenovelas Hiram and It Might Be You.  She asked if I was watching, but I wasn't since I was at Ayala watching over our store.  I told her how happy I was that she remembered and she told me that she remembered because she recalled what she wrote on her journal a year ago.  She also told me that it was when we first met that she bought her journal/diary and made her first entry in it.  I felt that was something special and I'm confused as to what to make of that.  What do you think peeps?  She then told me she will be going to Manila on the 26th of this month for training at BDO.  We talked only for a few minutes since I was called to drive to the construction site to check on the work there.  So that was it.  I felt happy that night... made my day complete.  I was able to sleep well and wake up the next morning feeling great.

I dunno what to make of it, but I was happy Monday and yesterday.  Now, I dunno how I feel.  I feel happy that I'm slowly getting my life back, but I'm shaking inside because I know that a big part of me still wants to hope in getting back with her... to see her... to talk to her in person... and to just be with her.  *sigh.  I dunno how I feel and why I am feeling this way, or worse, I dunno why I ALLOW myself to feel this way everyday since the day our roads parted.  Maybe I need a psychologist's explanation to this.

School's picking up to speed and I'm trying to squeeze the little bit left out of me to simply enjoy my classes. My SOSC teacher is very analytical and humorous. We talk about Philippine society and culture and I somehow enjoy the class because our teacher helps us become open-minded towards the realities of society. I hope I could also share to the class some of my views and perhaps I could also squeeze out from this class some of the answers to my endless questions regarding culture and why society responds in a certain way to certain situations. Today, our Literature 1 teacher held her first class and I felt like I was back being a freshman in this school. To introduce ourselves to the class (name, course, hobby), we had to come up with something creative like a skit or a presentation to accomplish that. We had some sort of a "Star Circle Quest" thing as our presentation to introduce ourselvesto the class. It was rather embarrassing because as a 5th year graduating student, I guess I'm over those kinds of things where you have to act out a play or sing or dance infront of the class to comply with the whims of the teacher. hehehe. I'm now at home blogging as early as 4:20 since Ma'am Ruth texted me an hour ago that she won't hold classes today, so my last class which is from 4:30-6:00 is now free. So I'm now watching TV to find some form of entertainment to amuse myself in this rather quiet and dragging existence of mine. Christmas is fast approaching and I could hear it coming each tme I go to the office, because my officemates just can't get their ears off the Christmas MP3s. hehehe. Gotta buy myself some ear muffs. *sigh Christmas... I dunno what's in store for Christmas this year. It will just pass me by, but I guess it will be a festive one nonetheless.

School officially starts today. This is the last stretch for my so called "college" life. In 4 months, I'll be free to chart my life... can't wait for that moment to come. There's something terribly wrong with my health now. At sometime 3AM for the past two successive nights, I woke up with convulsions. My body shivers all over and I could hardly breathe and I keep on coughing just to get a gasp of air. It's been happening for two straight nights already. If this still happens by Saturday, I'll try to seek doctor's advice on this.

REALIZATION OF THE TIMES

When I lost contact with the person I love, I wonder whether I made the right choice when returning back as friends was an option she laid on the table. In my attempts to keep the relationship, naturally I was not ammenable to the quick "restart back as friends" because it would mean that everything that happened was to go down the drain. But now I think I'd feel much better if we're still good friends than how miserably I'm feeling right now about the lost communication thing. I ask myself this: "Why am I hurting so much, such that the pain tears me everytime my mind thinks of what happened to us?" Could the next statements be the answer to my question? I need your thoughts peeps. Here it goes. The probable answer to my question could be: The intensity of the feeling of being hurt/affected is caused primarily by the loss of the FRIENDSHIP or what most of us would coin as the PINAGSAMAHAN. Though the love lost is also a big thing, but it's minimal compared to the loss of good times we once shared. We still claim to be bestfriends as of the time she wrote me that Friendster testimonial ... I dunno whether this statement still holds true for now on her side because it's been months since we haven't talked or seen each other. I THINK we are still friends, but why is it that whenever I wanna communicate with her either through text, email or call, something stops me from doing so. What stops me is what she told me in a text weeks ago and it went like this: "Lingaw baya to pag kita pa, pero I miss our laags and chika2X about life when we were still just friends." And when I asked her why is it that we can't relive thos laag2X and chika2X about life days, this was her reply "Now is not the time for chika2X and laag2X" And when I asked her why it's not the right time to start all over again, she said "Big factor akong parents and partly ako.a pud." As to what that statement meant, I have no idea what it means and I stopped asking na lang. So what did that reply mean to you peeps? Does that mean that we can't be friends anymore? I hope you dear readers could help me make out the meaning to it. I dunno how she is doing with her life, with her work, with the trip she just made, and as her friend I would want to know how she is because I still do care about her. Even if we broke up, there's still this part of me that continues to care and love her for who she really is. I really do. The only way to know that is for me to ask her, to communicate with her, but I can't because as she told me, communicating would only confuse her with her moving on process. She said that she still does think of me pero she doesn't text me because by texting me, she will remember the happy moments we once had and it would just confuse her daw with the break up decision she made. *sigh. So I guess this cutting of communication is something that's imposed on us by the current situation and I seem to have no choice but to follow such imposition. Guys initiate communication, but with the things she told me, I think doing so would just irritate her and could make things worse between us. Do you peeps think so? I think communicating won't hurt, but I'm afraid about what she might have to say about it. Anyway, I'd appreciate whatever thoughts you could give. For your comments, you may tag on the board or for more personal stuff, you can email me at johnalexanderlim@yahoo.com. I'd really appreciate it if anyone could give me some of their thoughts and advices. Thanks. I need your views, if you could spare some time for me. For those still in school, good luck nga pala in your studies for this semester. Start it right, start it with a bang!

Haven't blogged for so long.  I'm happy that my bestfriend Walter is now assigned in Cebu from his Convergys job in Manila.  We get to meet on Saturdays so I'm happy that I have a new companion for my free days.  Life won't be that much lonely anymore.  My cousin Achie Anna May who's a year older than I am will be getting married this December 31 so we will be taking a trip to Manila for her wedding.  She told me that I was going to have an important part sa wedding niya.  Ano kaya yun?  Haven't seen this cousin of mine for almost 6 years na.

Thanks peeps for your tags and your visits.  I'm surprised about Vanessa's tag.  It's nice to know that you still visit Van and still care to tag.  Tag more often kay I really miss the comments and opinions of people, especially that of yours.  Take care peeps!  Have a nice weekend with family.

I'm so happy today. Lexmark Management gave me an award for my exemplary performance for the first half of my OJT program. They also assigned me to instruct the new OJT applicants with regards to most of the processes and test we do in the office. I'm so happy jud. There's a lot to smile about. I hope this continues. I was also able to hang out with friends like Pancit, NatNat and Jimmy James this afternoon. I loved their company and it was fun hanging out with them at SM and EMall. I hope days like these will continue so that my face could also enjoy putting up a smile... something which has been denied of it for the past few weeks. hehehehe =) =) =)

Just came from Jedrick's bday party. It was fun, we played billiards after having dinner at Big Mao. I'm trying desperately to keep busy. And at times, I still do think of her. We stopped communicating na since her parents asked us to minimize texting and seeing each other. Haven't seen her almost half a month and we don't text anymore. =( *sigh. Is there any remedy to this? I'm losing her as a friend also this way.

All my projects are now complete. One more exam for tomorrow at 12:30 and the semester is FINALLY over. One semester to go and graduate NA JUD! Can't wait to be out of school na! School's eating me up. Waste of my precious time here on earth!

*sigh... I'm still thinking about her. Though how much I pretend that I'm OK, I know deep inside I am not. I wanna see her and hear her voice at least, because I really... really... miss her. I wanna text her or call her at home, but... I'm afraid to do so. I know man gud that communicating with her is not good because of what her parents want for her... and maybe because she doesn't want that too for herself. *sigh. It's tough to be in this position where you want to do nice things for your special someone, but you just can't because of the dictates of the reality of the situation. Maybe it would be better to hope na lang if she'd call or even have a conversation with me over text because if I were to initiate it, I don't know what she might have to say or what her parents might have to say again.

Maybe things are back to normal on her side, but how I wish I could say the same about me. When will things be right once more? I was happy when I was with her. I never expected things to go in this direction because I gave it the best I could to be the best boyfriend to her. I know that perhaps she still does like me. or does she? I dunno. I still like her very much, but sometimes I just repress my feelings so as not to complicate things. Do you peeps think repressing these feelings is the right thing to do? *sigh. One month na sana kami yesterday, BUT... hehehe Ok I'm boring you peeps na. Sorry. Till the next post.

It's too early for a Christmas theme and honestly, I don't feel the spirit of the season.

There's no better tranquilizer in this world than KEEPING BUSY. I've been really busy for the past few days with all the projects I had to accomplish before this final week ends. 2 more projects to go and they'll be completed by tomorrow... hopefully. No more exams for me and so I'll be free starting Thursday afternoon right after our project chacking. Yipee! Sembreak na.

I'll be also busy during sembreak to help in the construction of our new restaurant at St. Patrick's Square just behind STC. From design to construction itself, I'll be seeing through it all so that this store would conform to what I envisioned it to be. If I have to pour cement and put the tiles on the floor or if I have to saw pieces of wood or metal, then so be it. I just don't want to be bored this sembreak, because I realized that whenever I'm idle, all I think of is her and I know it's not good for me.

I'll be back to my gym workout days. Since it's sembreak, it would be a nice time to catch up on my weights again. It starts this Saturday morning. I hope I could get myself a gym partner this time. Maybe I'll get to meet my gym pals again... that's if they still do their regular workouts. hehehe. Till here. I've been sleeping as early as 8 nowadays and waking up at 7 just to free myself from being tricked by my mind by always thinking negative and ending up depressed. *sigh! This morning, we had a closed-door meeting at Lexmark to discuss the new project we'll be working on. My boss is counting a lot from me this time since she was impressed by my performance during the last project I worked on. Hopefully, shy could recommend me to become a regular employee once I apply for a regular post after I graduate. hehehe. Till here peeps and I'm planning to change my template again. Any ideas? Feel free to suggest.

Finals week here we come. Good luck peeps to you exams. As to me, I accomplished much yesterday. Was able to finish 2 projects in one sitting. One more to go and 2 exams more and I'm free!!! Finally this hell of a semester is nearing its death. hehehehe I'm getting bored already with what's happening in my life. I have so many things to do, but I just can't focus enough to make myself do them. So I'm just trying to count sheep while waiting for time to pass me by. As to her, her parents are putting pressure on her and her brother is also scolding her because of the thing we have for each other. I'm not sure what they are against: Are they against ME or against the thought of her having a boyfriend? NADA! I don't want to think of it anymore. I hope my mind can somehow stop running, because it's been accustomed already to always thinking about her. This has to stop eventually. How do you stop your mind from thinking of the person you love? How do you slow down your heart from beating itself just for her? How do you do all that while still hoping that someday it will turn out to be worthwhile?

Funny how events go up and down. I wonder if I should be posting events too soon into my blogsite because it will only confuse you my dear readers just as it confuses me.

We decided to meet last night. She picked me up from school at around 7. When I stepped into her Vitara, I was silent. I felt and ice wall was in between us with the radio waves pounding hard in my eardrums. And then she asked me where we were to go and I told her "Ahmbot. Ikaw gusto makig-kita" I can laugh now at how sour I was hahahaha! And then she tells me that I am "pala-away" because it was really mean of me to say that. She then told me that instead of going somewhere, she'll drop me off to my house na lang since she sensed I was in a bad mood. But I said no to that. And so she just drove. I then loosened up and made peace to her by asking her how her day was at the ofice and from that question, we managed to break the ice. She admitted to me that it was "kiwaw" from the start, but she was glad we broke the ice. We talked at the roofdeck of Off-Road near Kartzone. She decided on the place and it was a good choice. Nothing but open air and cars passing by below. We talked and we clarified things. She did love me and the only problem was the timing. I think that is fair enough a reason... I guess. Life goes on and we are closer friends than ever. I'm her best guy friend and she's my best girl friend. We are more free to accomplish our other responsibilities to family, work and school. She just asked me for time for her to mature. And I think I havfe no problem with that. Forcing the issue that we continue even if she's not yet mature enough will just lead to more problems. And she tld me that when the right time comes, she will be knocking on my door even if maulaw cya. And I told her not to be afraid of doing that when the right time comes. While sipping our drinks and feeding her the Choco mint cake, she gave me one of her hairbands... the one with the beads forming a star. She gave it to me because she wanted me to have it. Her reason: She gave it to me because I kept on playing with it when she wore it around her wrist while watching "The Notebook" with me last Saturday. And for her, she had lots of fun with me while watching our first movie as a couple. hehehe. And so she wanted me to keep it as a remembrance of that very happy moment. I told her I will keep it and hopefully someday, I could return it to her when she asks it from me soon.

Not bad right? And when I reached home, we had mooncake festival for around 2 hours. Won 2 Chirstmas canisters, 3 packs of juice and 2 ballpens. And then as I started to hit the sack at 10:30, we got to texting and texted till 12:30 AM. I think I'm happy with how things went for us. I just have to because love is all about me seeking her happiness whether her happiness includes me or not. I'm such a sucker for love.

So I guess that's the end of Volume One. Romance continues.... hopefully continues... at some later time.

It's an official break.  I won't be posting anymore about us, because to start off there's no more an "US" anymore.  We broke up last night because she said she's not mature enough to have a relationship and that she's not comfortable of having a boyfriend yet.  She said that we had to break up because she's not ready yet and it would just be a waste of my effort.  She said she couldn't breathe anymore (I still dunno why because I've never restricted her in any way.)  She also got turned off with the fact that I went to visit their house to talk to her parents.  I still don't think what I did was wrong because it is important that her parents know who's her boyfriend.  To her it was wrong, so I really can't change the way she viewed it.  I'm taking it really hard, but life must go on.... one aching day at a time till the Lord takes this pain away.  Tonight, she invited me to have dinner with her (just the two of us) as her friend because today marks her first day as a regular employee of Banco de Oro.  It pains me to see her because she will just remind me of the break up, but I am her bestfriend too, so I have to be there to share in her joy.  *sigh.

"Love is about being happy for someone even if their happiness does not include you."

Everything�s OK na, I guess. I�ve missed blogging since I've been bothered with what's happening to us. I just escaped a near-break up scenario. She was supposed to break up with me today because her parents will not approve of her having a boyfriend. I asked her if I could meet her parents because I really haven�t met them yet. She wouldn�t want me to, but I defied both rain, hassles of jeep travel and her wrath of course. So this afternoon, I went to their house. I was totally lost along Tres de Abril. And boy, the road was really one long road full of streets branching out from it. I got lost, so I called their house for directions. I overshot their house pala, so I walked a block or so in my polo, jeans and bringing with me a very big red paperbag with mooncake inside. It was a good thing no one dared to snatch me. As I was nearing the corner where a bakery was, I saw hands waving at me. So I knew it was them. And so it was time for �Meet The Parents� Her mom welcomed me to their home. We talked and a while later, her dad arrived from work. I was all the more scared. I could have shrunk right there and then, but they were a bunch of really nice people. They are funny and very accommodating. I was happy that they were happy to see me also. We talked and I told them EVERYTHING and all that I had felt for their daughter. They liked what I had to say and they repeatedly asked me what I really liked about their daughter. And so I told them.

Rouselle then texted me where I was because we were supposed to meet in school where she was supposed to drop the bomb on me, but I told her that I was at their house. She was furious! I didn�t know how to calm her down, so I just asked her parents to talk to her. She told them that she will only go home if I left their house. And so I did. I thanked her parents for accommodating me and they even offered to bring me to my house, but I declined politely. They just showed me to the door and so I took a 12L jeep to Ayala then rode another jeep from Ayala to Foodland and from there I walked home. Hehehe

They will talk with her tonight, so I�ll just have to pray it goes as well as how my talk with them went. On the way home, Rouselle wasn�t mad at me anymore. She was curious as to how my talk with her parents went. So I told her everything and I think she was happy at the outcome. *sigh. It�s really been a rollercoaster ride for me. I guess it�s always like this during the so-called adjustment period. Will blog more as to the outcome of this.

Lisa, thank you very much for the keychain and pen. I�ll just contact Gary as to how to give him his pen and keychain too. Hehehe� thanks a lot and thanks for the letter that came with it. More power to your blog!

Watched "The Notebook" with her. Not such a nice movie, but it was nice having someone to cuddle in the moviehouse. hehehehe. I liked the movie a bit, but not as nice as A Walk To Remember. She was tired yesterday from her Friday night out with her friends, so she was leaning towards me the whole time. hehehe. It was a nice feeling to have her head on my shoulder. hehehehehe. My turn for a night out was last night. Mary Ann Luy's party at Gerry's Grill. Had fun. Food was great and I ate a lot. hehehe. We then went to her house to make tambay. Had to leave rather early because Edwinn wanted to go home na and I had to hitch with him since we live in the same villlage. Hehehe. Nice day yesterday. Really one fantastic day!

Ready for Monday's thesis proposal presentation. I just hope they won't grill us. hehehe

I've never been this happy in my entire life.... My Girl loves me!!!

...and my thesis is going well. I just finished it this afternoon and I'm so happy that I have made it really wonderful. It showcased my best. Mock presentation tomorrow. I need not review already because I know the concept inside out... and besides, I'm the one who made the presentation, so nothing to worry. I'm confident about Monday's proposal presentation. Have to buy a new long sleeved polo for it. I have to check if my black slacks still fit me. hehe.

Till here peeps. To all those who in one way or another helped me attain this happiness, thank you very much. Thanks to everyone who still visits my site.

I got to accomplish so much today. Did our Thesis Powerpoint Presentation really fast and nice and I'm nearly done with the major slides. A few more are left and I think I can stay up late tonight to finish it, coz I'm so powered up. We had 2 experiments in our ComE 53 laboratory and I got all two, plus the bonus exercise. hehehe... *sigh... the amazing power of a woman on a man... Power of Inspiration... simply the best natural steroid out there. ;)

I'm reading what I posted just this afternoon and I'm laughing hard at all that. Stupid talaga. Funny but stupid. Here's the thing: She thinks I broke up with her by saying OK to her October reevaluation proposal. I thought she was breaking up with me by proposing such a thing. We talked tonight on the phone and instead of letting of steam, we were taking in air from all the laughs. All is well and I'm so happy. Finally, I have the inspirational push to make our thesis Powepoint presentation. This will be a nice one, probably my best yet.

Sorry peeps for the bother. Magulo lang talaga. Here are some excerpts from tonight's reply mail: "lets cancel oct. 20,forget na. comited nako nmo,il try my best gyud in this relationship,n i am not joking,il try my best,john.but please understand me ha kung libog ko,i am like that,sumtimes i dont know what i need man gud.so hope dli ka mapulan sa imo girlfriend............promise starting today dli nako libog..........starting today,il try my best to be the best girlfriend"

Ahhh, simply breathtaking. Thanks Lord!

I don't know what I got myself into. I dunno what's happening now, but even if we're a pair it seems as if our relationship is a monthly contract that has to be renewed from time to time. Ganito ba talaga? Is it a test or is it just the way it is. I no longer know her. Maybe she has changed or maybe we simply have lost that connection. I don't know why she has to aks her friends for advice or why she has to have second thoughts. I thought that when you are a pair, you decide as a team. Why is it still that others advice hold more weight that her own thoughts. What could I have done for her to do that? I dunno. The friends close to her are now in Manila and there's no way I'm gonna hassle them about this. I know they are all working hard there and this should be the least of their worries. I dunno where this will go to, but if this has to end then let it be God's will then. I won't give up easily because I love her and I gave too much to get to where we are now. I hope she appreciates everything we've done to get to this place. But it's all up to her. Only God nows and we are mere mortals.

I'm praying for a miracle to save us. May He give me the grace to accept His will without question.

So tired na jud from doing thesis work ALL DAY. My system resources are running low. Gotta shutdown. good night!

I'm now in school blogging. Sir Ca�ete decided not to hold classes today, so I have an hour of break. Maybe Sir Brian will not hold classes also, so I'll have the rest of the afternoon free till 5:30. My darling was not feeling well last night. She had sore throat which she got from an officemate of hers. Asked her to take some medication na. She's feeling better now, but I'm worried because she's now at work and her job is very demanding of her. I hope she's OK. She has to be. Hope to see her tonight after her work. Till here 'coz I have to compose some mails. Take care peeps and thanks for the tagboard messages. Thanks for visiting my site, especially Karen whom I haven't heard from for so long already. Welcome back Kar.

08:50 PM, Monday, September 13, 2004.
Finally, my heart has found Heaven in your heart. It's a promise on to forever.

Last Saturday was definitely a September 11 for me. Something bad happened in the morning and I really don't want to reminisce it once more because it's just so... argh! Thanks to the mere presence of my significant other, my day was not totally wrecked. Was supposed to watch Princess Diaries 2 with her, but the architect for our new outlet wanted to see me and my mom so it totally changed my plans for that afternoon. It was nice of her to understand my extremely busy schedule. After the talk with the architect, I met up with Rouselle and Winnie at Ayala. We just talked at Starbucks for an hour or so, before we split ways. I then watched Princess Diaries 2 with my mom and bro that night. While watching, I couldn't help but wish that I could have watched that same movie a few hours ago with the person that means so much to me... but... *sigh... all I can do was imagine and regret not being able to. Time sure has a way of f*cki*g things up for me.

Right now, I don't know in what state I am. Now, I am the clueless one. I've never been in this game called love and now I don't know where this is all going. There's just not enough time to talk and I could feel that we're living worlds apart even if we're just both in Cebu City. It's tough to be courting someone when you're just a student and she's working. Time is just a huge player and I've never been best friends with time. How am I to make sense of all these? Everything nice that we've built together is slowly falling apart due to the uncertainty of things. She was and is still afraid because of the countless breakups and fights she sees around her. How could I make her believe that this "relationship" will be different, that it will have a fairytale ending, that I could make her the happiest girl on the planet. How do I convince my best girl friend to, for at least once in her life, BELIEVE. I was once confident and sure, but now I'm slowly having fears that this would all collapse to one big pile of junk. There's no continuity of events. Things are in an on and off state due to or busy schedules and the constraints of time and space. I wanna steer this "relationship" smoothly, but... BUT... wait a minute... is there really a relationship here? Bottomline is we're MU... Murag Uyab... murag lang. We do things like couples do (except the kissing hugging and holding hands, etc.) but we are not. I'm now questioning who's the one who's confused now. I think it's me. Pray John, pray harder.

I'm blogging from school. Had fun talking to my dear Sushi last night via phone. She has a very nice voice sa phone... so girlie... melts my heart! hehehe. We talked about lots of things. Told her about my Unilever BWeek Group simulation this coming Saturday, that's tomorrow already. She plans to be there for moral support. I hope we won't be too busy that she'd get OP. If I get good marks on the group simulation in the morning, then I'll be having a one-on-one interview with some of Unilever's top management executives. I hope and pray that I'll reach that stage of the selection process. I'll give my best tomorrow, and whatever happens may it be for the best. If there's still time after the whole day selection process, I told my dear that we'll be watching Princess Diaries 2. We've long been waiting to watch this movie, so I hope time would permit us to watch it together. Please lang jud. Till here, have to reply her email. Take care peeps.

By the way, I miss those times when I blog in response to a debatable subject. Feel free to post on my tagboard issues you'd like to be commented. Now would be a good time to share my thoughts once more. k? =) =) =)

Everything's OK now. It was just a horror movie. I won't let that happen again ever. EVER!

Tears are falling from the heavens. The tears of an Angel are precious... someone please help me let the tears stop falling... I'm sory, so sorry, but all I wanted to tell you was the truth, the curse inside me. Please let me ride on your wings, because it wasn't really I who made you cry.

BAD day today. As in B - A - D! Thanks a lot for the people who made it easier for me to cope with it... to Faith who lent me her phone, to Leslie for the 20 minute talk and to Vahid to the advise as to what to do. Till here... I don't feel like pressing another key.

I'll post something below and tell me what you peeps think of it. I hope you peeps will smile but not have an aching jaw afterwards. This happened last night and I slept immediately kay I just can't wipe the smile off my face.

BOY: Had dinner na? Wat you doing diay?

GIRL: Watching Hiram. Nyc au ang story ron.

BOY: Nice bitaw. Nice pud mga movies ron.

GIRL: What are the movies nga showing? Naa na Princess Diaries 2?

BOY: The Stepford Wives, Cinderella Story, and Eternal Sunshine. wala pa showing Prnces Diaries2

GIRL: I like to watch Stepford Wives. Nyc au na. I'll watch it this Friday. Sus, gasto nasad.

BOY: Hahaha! Does that mean, "How I wish I have a boyfriend who could make libre and watch it together with me" Pasensya na ni katok akong ulo.

GIRL: I can always watch it for free with popcorn and dinner from my other suitors. Pasensya na, ni katok pud akong ulo. =P"

BOY: That's not funny. Who jokes about that? hahaha! gotcha! Ayay... naa diay other suitors? By the way, I just remembered, one of my suitor girls is asking me to watch Cinderella Story with her this Sat. hahaha!

AFTER 15 MINUTES OF INACTIVITY, BOY's PHONE BEEPS!

GIRL: Ey, suko ka?

BOY is composing a punchline text, when suddenly... BOY's phone rings and BOY answers.

GIRL: Uy, suko ka?

BOY: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! wala uy. HAHAHAHAHAHA!

GIRL: Che! sige bye!

TEXTING RESUMES

BOY: HAHAHA! seems like someone is afraid to lose someone... hmmm...

GIRL: Wala ra to uy, dili man gud ko ka sleep if kibaw ko nga naay na lain nako.

BOY: HAHAHA! Defensive! gud nyt na. dnt reply na kay maski unsaon nimo pag reason, daog gihapon ko.

GIRL: Lagi2X... I hope your happy about it. cge, gudnyt. switdrims bye=)

BOY: Gudnyt my dear! switdrims =)

*END OF CONVERSATION*

Comments pls. I think someone's warming up on me already. Lisa, does this answer your question in my tagboard?a

Blogging through mail here at Lexmark.  Work starts at 8:00 and it's still 7:45 here so I have some free time before doing actual work.

Banilad Town Center...  Nice suggestion, but it's rather far from the city for the downtown and Fuente people, but it's still a good idea.  I'd still prefer a location that's near Capitol, since that's the area where we have most of our patronizing customers.  I heard Sunburst will be moving to that same location and I doubt if the owners of Banilad Town Center would allow us to open there since they too are the franchisees of Sunburst.  But still we'll give it a try.  No harm trying.

Lisa, I agree with you about those things Ayala did to your ex's salon in Makati.  Ayala always tries to grab a part of your business, but they don't do their fair share.  Maybe it's because they want it to fail so that they could take over from there and add it to their list of owned companies.  They are no different from their land-grabbing Spanish roots.  Sometimes it's really irritating and I feel like suing them for it, but somehow they're entitled to do that since as mall tenants, we play by their rules.  They can always tell us that if we're not OK with it, then we have to find some place else.  Sick world!

As early as 7:45 yesterday morning, I met with my lalabs at the entrance to our building here at Lexmark.  She dropped off some pasalubong sweets from her trip to Dumaguete.  I asked her to buy some piyaya since I like them very much.  I told her I was gonna pay for it, but she gave them for free and even included a lot of rainbow cakes and yemas and other delicacies all in one plastic bag.  Thank you very much!  I too surprised her with a rose that early in the morning.  She was so surprised to see it!  Hahahaha!  Hmm... the facial expression of a girl receiving a flower... priceless.  Hehehe.  We just met for 5 minutes, since she had to head off to work already.  *sigh  I could have called it a day as early as 7:50AM.

Saw Gary at school yesterday.  Wasn't able to talk much since we were out on researchwork for Ma'am Mari's class.  We had just an hour to do all the research as our midterm exam, so got no time to lose.  Sa susunod na lang Gar.  Nice to hear you're doing OK sa Main.

Slept early last night so I wasn't able to read her usual mails.  I was just lying in bed watching TV after having dinner and the next thing I remember, it's morning!  hehehe  Okay, it's 8:00 already gotta go do some work.

Dark day for our business. Ayala management just informed us today that they are doing a rezoning of the shops in the mall. As of now, shops such as Chedz, Orange Brutus, Persian Plate, Caf� Wien, RaiRai Ken, AV Surfer and our store were asked to relocate to a new location within the mall. Contracts of shops in Ayala are on a per year basis, so they won�t renew our contract unless we move out to another space. *sigh� We can�t do anything since it�s their mall!!! If we only knew about this, we should have taken that space now occupied by Shakey�s when it was offered to us a few months ago� *sigh� life has a way of adding more to our woes. Maybe it�s a sign that we should stop doing business with Ayala. It�s so difficult to be working with them. They demand a lot and they give us only little room to work with. It�s as if we�re working our @$$*s for them and they don�t seem to give a $**t about how we feel. For now, we have our eyes set at SM or someplace outside the malls. If you peeps know of a space for lease somewhere in uptown Cebu, or any place between Banilad and Capitol, please inform me. We�d really appreciate all the help we can get at this moment. Thanks and till here. I don�t feel like blogging at all. Take care peeps and hope everything happens for the best.

The beach was fun. Lunch was great! I ate a lot.. hehehe. Our bosses rented a jetski and a banana boat. I wasn't able to ride the banana boat since I thought it wasn't that much fun compared to the jetski ride. I got to drive the jetski twice. And for the second drive, I tried to drive it like a Ferrari on water. Hehehe... It's fun to drive against the waves pala. You get the strong bumps and you'd love the wave challenge. hehehe. My face got slightly burned through the wind friction. I reached home at around 4:30 and slept all the way from then till now. Hehehe... I'm so tired. Have to eat dinner and sleep again. What a pig! hehehe... Till here peeps.

I don�t feel so good about blogging this, but I just have to since this is my blog and it�s important that I write this down so that I could read this someday and see what has become of it. It�s definitely an important chapter in my life as this is the first trial I faced with the girl I love. I hope that if any of you know the persons involved, please, under any circumstance, do not CONFRONT or SPEAK OF IT. Promise me this. I leave it to your conscience to decide what�s right. I don�t want this to be big. You are privileged to read this out of my trust in you. You wouldn�t want me to lose my trust in you.

Are we okay with that? So here it goes:

Something happened last night. I was sleepy and was waiting for some downloads to finish. I chat always when I have a basket full of files to download. I said a few things over at mIRC� my views and feelings about my current situation, which I feel is personal and which I felt I shared out of trust that the person would understand and keep it to herself. I was very open with what I felt knowing that she�s a common friend of both of us and I believe I could trust her well enough. Little did I know that my openness was taken for granted. She emailed the minutes of our chat to this girl I like so much. And so late this afternoon at Ayala, I got to read the email my girl sent me last night. She expressed that she was hurt by the things I said to her friend about how I see things right now. I was confused last night and maybe I said those things because I wasn�t sure of how she felt for me. I receive different kinds of signals from her, so I guess I�m entitled to react that way. Nevertheless, it was wrong of me to get my insecurities and impatience in the way of loving someone as nice as her. I just said what I felt inside to this friend of ours� things that I believe shouldn�t reach her ear since I was just ranting out of frustration. I didn�t mean my words. As I said, I was just ranting. When people rant, they engage in nonsense talk which they usually end up regretting to have said. True in this case. Lesson learned: John, when you�re sleepy, don�t chat. Go to bed!

And so it was that my hands shook terribly. My head split. My heart pounded fast not knowing what to do now that I�ve hurt the person whom I couldn�t ever afford to hurt. I can�t risk being in this jittery situation since we have a history of heart disease and I think I have fractions of it too. I then rushed to the counter to pay my internet usage and I rushed to pick up a nice bouquet at Holland Tulips, rode on a speeding cab and personally gave the bouquet to her in the bank to ask for forgiveness. We talked for a while outside and she was smiling at me. No trace whatsoever of how hurt she was last night. How could someone manage to smile at me like that after the things I said? If not for the chismoso security guards who were staring at us, I would have cried infront of her out of shame. We clarified a few things and she was just thanking me for the flowers the whole time. I would have wanted to give her my first bouquet of BETTER flowers at a more opportune and happy time, but I guess things have a way of ruining my �plans�� things that are beyond control. As to the hidden purpose of God�s move today, I don�t know what He has in mind. All I know is that I did the right thing by saying sorry. And she was nice to forgive me.

In her email, she was disappointed in me, but I liked a few phrases she said, especially this in particular. I wrote it in her own original words which are now immortal in my heart. This was what she had to say.

�...i know that i like you,but is this feeling real,if love means that ur always thinking of the person,then maybe im in love with you.but love is infinite and for me undescribable...�

how nice. =)

Anyway, she�s on her way to Dumaguete for a trip with Diane and Lolo. God bless their way and I hope she�ll have fun moments there. As for me, beach outing tomorrow with Lexmark peeps. Gotta sleep! No chat for John tonight! Good night peeps!

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I was testing this new blog service I just recently knew about. You can afterall post blog by emailing it to Blogger. Kewl! Another dicovery today was this: try to read through my archives at www.johnalim.blogspot.com/johnalim_archive.html Take a look at my post on November 16, 2003 that's a Sunday of what went on during November 15, 2003, a Saturday. Read the paragraphs nearing the end. Notice that during that time, my world was out cold. My site's title then was World On Ice. I was numb and frozen emotionally. And then I mention something about someone attempting to heat up my frozen world. So I shunned the thought naturally, but take a look now. That same person who threatened my frozen world is now the person who keeps my world warm and cozy. You can't really tell what's in store for you. Amazing at how magic works!

Had the best time last Saturday night with friends. Dinner at Big Mao, then karaoke to the max at K1!!! Hahahaha! My darling Angel can SING!!!! I was so amazed! Fun, fun, fun. Our finale song was �That Thing You Do�. Second to the last song was �Katawan� hahahahaha! The girls were all laughing hysterically at us guys when we (me, Boogie and Kiwi) went wild over the song. Hahahahaha! By the way, Unilever called me up just this Saturday through my mobile. I�ve been chosen for the preliminary interview with simulation I�m so happy!!!

On the other hand, I�m thinking a lot about something. Even on Angel�s Wings, I have to throw down some anchors too once in a while �coz the GIRL sends different signs. Ano nga ba talaga? Remember the quote"Don't say I love you if you don't mean it. And if you do, then say it!" heheheh I�m sure at the end of this, I�ll be the confused one, not her anymore. Wanna put a bet on that? You�re on! Do I hear a 500? hehehe

I'm so looking forward to next week... NO CLASSES!!!! Intramurals week next week. My friend Kittin will be our muse for the College of Engineering. Hope she wins the title as Miss Intrams 2004. Helped her a bit last night with her walk. Hopefully she could get the poses and her walk. I've coached 2 beauties already who all made it to the crown... hehehe. I hope she could win the title! I'll try to watch the opening, but sad to say even if no classes, we have duty at Lexmark during the mornings.

I'm also looking forward to our beach adventure this coming Saturday at Cebu Beach Club. Our bosses from U.S.A. wil be coming over in time for our product launch and they will be throwing a beach party for all of us on the team. Yipee!

Till here 'coz I have to start composing the letter I promised to send her through snail mail. Hehehe... this keeps getting better and better. Till here peeps! Like my new template? I wanna hear what you peeps think of it? I think it's too "girlie" hehehe... but oh well I like it the way it is. hehehe

My birthday was YESTERDAY. Forgot to post since by the time I reached the house, I immediately hit the sack. I slept late for my birthday. Was doing emails as late as 3AM, nakaYM ko pa si Lisa... hehehe. Slept at around 4, then had to wake up at 6:30 to eat miswa (a meal customary for birthdays) and then head off to Lexmark for duty.

Then my hands were always on the mobile since people were there to greet me sa text. Si Leslie lang talaga nag greet sa akin by calling my phone... kaya lang late cya one day. Hehehe Today lang tumawag... hehehe... pero OK lang talaga. It's good to hear your voice all the way from Manila.

Well, my birthday swept like just an ordinary day. Attended my classes after work straight from 12 noon all the way to 4:30, then had dinner at Mayi with mom and bro. Sarap ng lambchops! And due to the red wine, flat ako sa pag-uwi. Wasn't able pa nga to open my much awaited email at the end of the day. So here I am at Metro Cafe reading my email and posting blog. Still enjoying my break here at Ayala till 5, then have to go to school for my evening classes. Take care you peeps and God Bless!

�When you love someone you�d move heaven and earth to prove your love to them. And while you�re doing all that moving and heaving, you feel the rush, the strength of Hercules and the might of Zeus, that not even the threat of Hades could stand in your way. And when all is done and paradise becomes that sparkling diamond right before your eyes, your body begins to shake in weary. And as you fall nearly to your knees, your muse, to whom all that effort was for, catches you in her loving arms and nurses you to the care of Eden�s shade. As you awaken, that blurry image you see is Helen. Deep inside your heart, you know that not only have you taken to sea a thousand ships, you shook earth and defied the gods to hold time within the palm of your hands. And so at the end of the voyage, you realize that time is indeed worth more than gold. Thus, it is the most treasured gift you could ever offer to the one your heart beats just for.�

�Yesterday, I fought the hard rain, the stormy wind and the will of my greatest enemy just to be with YOU. A week seems like a year�s wait, but every moment with you passes by like hours turned to seconds. Thank you for being by my side always, for wanting to be with me, for your warmth and thoughtfulness and for being the sun that rises my morning day and the last twinkle of a star before I close my eyes.� I thank God in my prayers always for letting someone like you come my way.�

T.G.I.F.!!!

No more exams for me... 'coz most of my teachers postponed the exams to next week.... grrr... if that's the case then why'd they have to schedule midterms week this week anyway. Sick teachers, wasting our time in studying only to surprise us with "No exam, next week na lang." And they seem so proud that by doing that they're making us happy! They're just prolonging the agony, but it's still there beckoning upon us like a hawk ready to prance on its prey. Imagine I had to study late into the night even if I was having difficulty breathing thanks to my flu, and come exam day... tadah! They shoot your determined efforts to hell. Crappy teachers, should have been a better stude in Ateneo. Damn this school, not even the teachers I admire could make me appreciate this wretched school. There's no saving grace for it. Konting tiis na lang. 7 months and I'm outta the pig sty.

Even if no school for me today, had to wake up early to go to work. Work was fine, boss was nice enough not to batter us to pieces. Felt better after working. It's because of the joys of work that makes me not want to go to school anymore. Learning and memorizing all those useless info which won't be used in the workplace... I mean, who asks you about computer history at work, or who asks you to define ENIAC in Lexmark??? puhleezzzz...

So I'm now at home recuperating. I'll be fine by 8 more hours of rest... my angst is an indicator that I'm getting better. I can feel the energy getting back to me. In the meantime, I just have to take a nap and probably think of what I will be doing tomorrow afternoon. Gonna do overtime at Lexmark tomorrow morning to test some problematic issues. We're gonna be paid for O.T. so it means more money, besides it's better to be working on a Saturday morning than just be flat on bed like a pig.! It's gonna be SATURDAY in less than 6 hours! Yipee, my favorite day of the week, here I come!

I thought smiling all day could do wonders for your health. Well, it's rather peculiar that I woke up with a very sore throat, head throbbing and so tired. Hmmm... I went to work and was nearly late since I really didn't feel like going in today. Damn rainy weather! So when I reached Lexmark, the office was friggin cold... and as a result, my throat's condition worsened, then suddenly I had a runny nose. I can't breathe well and was cold all over. Suddenly I felt warm outside and cold inside. FEVER! So I wore my jacket, but still was feverish. Then of all days, today was the busiest day throughout my entire stay at Lexmark. I even had to do ovetime to finish my work. It was a good thing midterms week ngayon so I didn't have a 12:00 class to catch. Then aside from my work, I had to help my other officemates troubleshoot their printers since many of the equipment were rather uncooperative today. So had to entertain them at the same time work on my stuff. For a moment there my throat wasn't sore and the fever was gone. And then I got to have lunch at around 1:00 already. I couldn't taste the pasta 'coz of my runny nose. And in the process of eating, I bit my tongue. Ouch! It really hurts!!! It's still bleeding till now (time check 5:00PM). It really hurts even afer taking mefenamic!!! I really got to bite hard and I really felt my teeth punch in so deeply. It was like eating my own meat! eeewww...

After that agonizing trip in the jeep to school, I took my midterm exams for ComE52 at 2:00. I was scared 'coz it's the subject that has been bothering me. At first set up, our circuit did not work, so troubleshoot, troubleshoot troubleshoot. And then at around 4:00, our program and circuit understood each other and that was 100 points for us! Yipee! I'm so happy! Felt relieved and very happy afterwards. It certainly felt as if I hit a jackpot or something. Gave out a loud hurrah inside the lab just to release that anxiety that has been building up inside. Hehehe...

I'm so happy now despite my health condition. Got my ComE52 exam and I also got a text this morning from Sassy Girl wishing me good luck sa midterms. So that's the first exam this week I aced for her. Lakas talaga ng tama ng isang babae sa isang lalaki! *mushy mush mush... wakekekeke Hope my other exams will also have that kind of result.

So now I'm at TAP TC surfing the net and checking people's blogs. Hehehe... I'll be fetched at 5:30 yet, so tll then I'll just be bum'n around the world wide web. hehehe Good luck peeps in your midterms!

Hmmm... I was so happy during our make-up laboratory in ComE 52. Finally the wires, circuits and devices were willing to cooperate! We got +10 bonus for tomorrow's exam. Till here 'coz have to read my favorite email before I sleep for tomorrow's first day of midterms. To all those taking exams, good luck!

^___________________^ She likes me! But "like" still has to be refined whether as a friend or as more than that. So I'll just have to wait... even if it takes forever... hahahaha! I'm so happy that we still do emails as usual and that she still talks and texts with me. 'kala ko mawala na ang tao sa akin. She's really one nice girl... one that any guy would be proud to introduce to his 'rentz. And that makes me love her even more!

*hoping for a miracle!

I finally did what a guy has to do. And now my muse knows how I truly feel. She chuckles and keeps on joking about it. I don't know if she took me seriously or not, but I have done my part. Clock struck 7 and we had to go separate ways. I to my commander and she to something she had to do, which she said is "secret". And now she's on top of the world. It was tired being on top, but it would now be a wonderful challenge to be below. I don't know how she feels, but all I could do is wait till she finds herself and how she truly feels for me. All I could ask for is a chance, and if I get more than a chance then it would be the blessing I've waited for for so many years. May it finally be love. Let it be a match made in Heaven!

Today's a holiday here since it's Charter Day for Cebu Province, so no class. I made good use of my day today. We made much progress in our thesis project. We just finished the entire Chapter 1 of our documentation. I now have a clearer view of how this will turn out to be. I feel so happy 'coz we had fun writing the introduction for our thesis documentation. I could say that our thesis topic is very scientific, but somehow we wrote our introduction rather catchy, modern and non-technical. By reading it once, you know that the researchers are YOUNG people. hehehe.

We had lunch here at home with my groupmates and I just got home from dropping them off at the corner. We'll be going to Ayala any minute now. Till then. Ciao!

Hmmm... Les, are you sure? It doesn't seem like that from the emails we have everyday. But then, I could be wrong. I was never good with reading women's minds. Anyway, talk nya ta, not here, but maybe in my email. Email me k? johnalexanderlim@yahoo.com But I think I'd still pursue 'coz you know me too well not to be a quitter. And you know very well how extremely special this girl is to me.

I think it will work. It just has to. It's about time someone saves my life. I'll blog more tomorrow. I'm so tired already. Gonna sleep with this on my face ^_________^

Just came home after watching Ella Enchanted. Very nice movie and very entertaining. I can't wait till Princess Diaries 2. Spent the afternoon just at the mall reading the newspaper and solving the crossword puzzle. Such a boring afternoon went to waste. I'm craving for the beach. How I wish I could get some seabreeze so as to free my mind from whimsies. Till here, I don't feel like blogging.

Never mind the rains, but I just like the weather. It's cold and hardly any sun. Feels just like being in Baguio, but not. hehehe. *sigh. It took me a long while to get myself out of bed, since my bed was too cozy for me to rise up and get myself up to work as early as 7:30 AM at Lexmark. Just have to be thankful for the job, 'coz it also speeds up my day and I derive enjoyment from it too. I feel that time flies really fast while I'm working at Lexmark. Then time slows down in school, really super duper slow.

When I get home, first thing I do is to log on to the net. All throughout the day, whether at work or school, I always look forward to going home already to open my Friendster inbox. I know that at the end of the day, there's something waiting for me at home, ready for me to relish such indulgence. I'm so thankful that in this information age, there are so many ways already for people to communicate, so I guess there's no reason for us to make excuses anymore. Thanks to the power of email, I get to communicate with HER during weekdays. We've found out that texting is not enough and it's tedious to push 'em buttons when there's a nice conversation going on. Chatting on mIRC or on the phone encourages shallow cheap talk and it discourages deep thought, so email is the best way to communicate. It's been 5 straight days of this already and I still crave for more conversations with HER.

I dunno what plans there are for Saturday... but if there's a nice movie then at least I could skip a day of emailing to really get to talk with the person personally. *sigh. I really dunno what I'm feeling now. Giving in to emotions has been a disaster for me too many times already. Holding back my feelings would be an injustice and unhealthy. But as Lisa said, one who doesn't risk loses more. And I don't wanna lose this great person the Lord has sent to me. A guy's got to do what a guy's got to do, and if destiny and God wills it, then so be it.

SHE asked me yesterday what my website URL is and I refused to give. I had a hard time declining, but SHE was nice enough to understand. Should I have given her the URL or not? I think I was right in doing so, or was I. Argh! I guess it could wait till THE DAY. *sigh! When would that DAY come anyway?!?! I'm starting to talk nonsense already, so till here 'coz I'm about to be fetched from school. Till my next post, take care y'all.

I don't know where I stand.  Somehow I've become too cynical to even see the joy in the little gestures others do.  It's never difficult to please someone, but why do I make it so difficult for myself to sustain joy in all its forms.  Someone please donate a few nerve endings to my cause.  Maybe all I need is to once again bloom like a wildflower on the first day of spring.  I'm scared, I'm confused as to how I feel.  I'm like Data, curious about human emotion and yet void of it.

Sometimes I feel that studying computers has made me into one.  Please click my START button.

This day is definitely THE day of the week!  Can't stop smiling.  See.... ^_________________________^

Someone just made my day and my week.  That's just 5 hours, but definitely time flew so fast that I just couldn't get enough of it.

I'm at TC blogging. Just came from eTelecare to visit Leslie before she goes to Manila for her trip. Magpakabait ka dun ha... or else... hwag ka nang bumalik dito. hahaha! jok3X Seriously, take good care of yourself in Manila. Maraming gago at manloloko dyan, plus lots of temptations to spend money unwisely on gimiks. And please, please lang, as what I've told you don't spend too much time with *toot. Mas mabuti if you could concentrate with your training there, okay??? I hope you get to learn a lot from your training so you'll get promoted fast. Gusto ko ring magkaroon ng mga rich friends, you know. hahaha!

Don't worry, alagaan ko nang mabuti yung bestpren mo. Tulungan mo naman ako nang kahit paminsan-minsan lang even if you'll be in Manila already. Alam mo naman how serious I am about *toot. :p Blog once in a while naman para we'll know how you're doing. Mahal na ang piso kasi. :p Cge, take care. Sori talaga that I'll have to skip on your dispidida. My class ends at 8:30 and I haven't asked permission 'coz I just knew the change of schedule just late last night. Sabagay, I visited you naman kanina, so I hope magkitakita tayo very soon. 4 months is just a very short period of time, so make the most of it and have fun with your new job. Ingatz!

I'm living a life of a swaying compass. No direction at all. In the office, not much mork nowadays. I dunno why, but suddenly I feel as if they're paying us to just endure the freezing cold office. In school, our discussions go nowhere. It's like high school was a lot more challenging. So what's there for me to do? I'm wasting time... I'm idle. Somebody give me direction. Make me do something, instruct me, order me, demand me, keep me busy. I'm young and I'm supposed to keep busy. Idle time is for old folks. I'm ranting already. Enough! Maybe some other day. Tomorrow will just be the same as today, just as today was the tomorrow I predicted yesterday.
*listening to some trance music. Hopefully I get into a comma and never wake up from it. Better to be a cabbage than endure the agony of boredom.

If I had a blowtorch at my disposal, I'd want to burn my room's aircon to the last piece of ash I could extract from it. The aircon's fuse blew due to a malfunction in the aircon's main capacitor. So instead of spending my afternoon as I planned last night, I ended up having to stay at home to supervise the mechanic upon orders of my mom. What's worse was that the mechanic, after an hour of fixing, told us that he couldn't fix it and that he'll be back on Monday to replace the busted parts. That definitely blew my fuse and I was really steaming with disgust. Of all days to pick, it had to blow up today! F*%k!
What can I do??? Saturday is only the day I get to enjoy after 5 days of working and studying. And my day of fun was just shot to hell! Oh well, what can I achieve by ranting, so I just watched the Mike Francis concert... Just arrived home from the concert where I had lots of fun listening to the music and the beat. People were in high spirits and the person beside me was dancing like there's no tomorrow. Fun, fun, fun, but definitely not enough to cover my awful afternoon date with the stupid aircon. This cannot be happening to me!!! What now? Any plans to shoot my Sunday to hell as well???

Congratulations to Leslie for getting the job at eTelecare!  Told you you'd make it.  After your training, our offices will just be a road and a few floors apart.  Bisita2X lang! hehehe  It's so nice to see friends already working.  Makes you feel quite grown-up though (everyone has to anyway), but surely it feels good to be a productive citizen.
 
I'm so happy now that I can't sleep.  *sigh.  I have Sassy Girl to thank for this wonderful feeling.  So how do I sleep so I could wake up in time for tomorrow's 8:30 class.  Hmm...
 
Tomorrow is a busy day ahead.  Thesis work tomorrow morning then in the afternoon will be time spent with Jeon Ji Hyun to buy her dress for a wedding.  Hmmm....  Then in the evening, I'll be spending time with family.  We'll be watching the Mike Francis concert at the Ayala Activity Center.  My days couldn't get any better than this.
 
Someone once told me that she draws strength from the Lord even though her tough nature doesn't seem to show.  I'm glad that her words made me reconsider the fate of my soul and I'm glad that my faith in HIM has never been as strong as ever.  Thanks a bunch for welcoming me back to the flock.

5 Candles
Yesterday, I knew I was going to have a long and probably a rough day ahead of me. So as I was on my way to USC Main for a Unilever Career Recruitment, I passed by Sto. Rosario Church to light 5 candles� 5 separate candles for 5 distinct petitions for the day. Sometimes a positive attitude or simply knowing that God has listened to your plea actually releases my mind free from having to think of the bumpy road ahead. With a light heart and a worry-free mind, I took the next few steps to USC Main.

Choosing Among Infinite Dreams
I was too early for the 9:00 recruitment. I reached school as early as 7:30, since that�s the only time I get to have a free ride to school (and to Lexmark on ordinary working days) when my Tita Lynn is on her way to the office near Capitol. I was just walking around, exploring the school during its more silent wee hours. USC Main is eerie when you see no people around, but given the same situation in TC, it feels as if you have a vacation house all to yourself, nyahahaha. And so at 8:45, I returned back to room 426 where the recruitment was to be held, and there I met some of my classmates. Many were invited from the different courses, but majority of those who showed up were the engineering students most of whom are friends of mine from the other councils and previous sophomore year IE classmates.

And at around 9:30 came the Unilever recruitment team. Just as I guessed, it was Vincent Sandoval who was to handle our recruitment. He�s our high school batch valedictorian who�s now working at Unilever in Manila. And so the recruitment went on� we were to apply for a coveted spot to enter their �Business Week� � a 5 day gathering of our country�s top graduates who are to receive training in business/marketing, etc. in Manila on October 18-22. Mr. Ray Villaflores, Visayas Area Manager of Unilever, also a former Carolinian, gave us a very inspirational talk, which made me think a lot. Though Unilever is more of marketing, sales and finance rather than computers and I.T., I started thinking as to how to run this course called �Knowing What Role You Want To Play�.

My dream cloud was suddenly challenged. Now I�m confused whether to take Masters in Computer Science or whether I should instead get an MBA. Having a masters degree definitely is an edge, but the issue here is whether to pursue the technical aspect of a job or to shift to the business side of it. Sad reality of the working world is that managers who don�t even know how to make a simple computer program like printing �Hello World� on the computer screen are paid much much higher than technical engineers who have the better knowhow and skills. Maybe I�m just frustrated with my course now. Should have taken Computer Science! In Lexmark, I could see how useless my course is, and to think Lexmark is the top choice for Computer Eng�g graduates. I could imagine how even more useless this course is to the other companies out there. If ever there�s some use of it, the pay is low and not commensurate to our credentials.

Hmm� maybe an MBA would be best. Gotta give Ateneo a second try. Listening to Tina Arena�s �Burn� fits my confused situation!

Of Trust and Growth
After the Unilever recruitment, I went to TC. Had lunch at the restaurant across owned by Fritz, Darrell and Andrew to support the business they put up after graduating. Try their sausage meals. Clock struck 1:30, left Diner and went to TC for our USC Robotics Club elections. I can see brighter grounds for the club. I�ve had several differences in the past few months with Melvin, this year�s president. But, from yesterday�s meeting, I guess he isn�t so bad afterall. I think he could do a better job this year with the club rallying behind him. I�ve promised to back him up in areas where I�m more knowledgable, but I�m sure those �areas� are just too minimal and are� like on a special case only. More funds to raise this time with more members and bigger dreams to build. I�m now wondering why I was so against him. Maybe the things that happened just struck my pride� something I�m rather sensitive about, I being a Leo. What�s pride anyway without the capacity to make things happen. So now I have to put my trust in him, and helping him make this club I started grow to what I�ve envisioned it to be. I just realized that things like these are analogous to family business empires. A generation builds, but it has to be the next generation that will make it grow and then the next destroys it� hehe. I don�t think the third phase would apply, just the 1st and second. Letting go can make you grow.

Shuttle Cock and Pizza
The meeting ended sometime 3:15. Got picked up at school by mom and was dropped off at Metro Sports to play badminton with Leslie, Dianne, Rouselle, KenKen, EngEng, Lolo, Pancit and Anton. My sweat was dripping as I played the game since the place was rather warm. Met Karen Dy and Mimi playing at the court across ours. Nice exercise really and I enjoyed playing a lot. Now my right arm and hips hurt.

After 2 hours of playing, we went to pig out at MB�s in Mactan. Finally I was able to go to that resto which so many people have been telling me about. It was my first time there and I loved the food instantly. The pizza was tastly (I still like Il Sole�s and Paparazzi�s Capriciossa and La Gondola�s Wasabi Pizza) and their steak with mashed potato was also one of the best I�ve tasted. A heavy downpour came and the sky was well lit with streaks of lightning and suddenly poof, the lights went out. Probably the heavens did not favor our pigging out after s weight-loss exercise such as badminton� hehehe From dinner till the time Dianne dropped me off home, we had a conversation which rather stirred up the hornets nest of our emotional beehive. And while inside the Corolla Altis, my head was throbbing. I couldn�t make sense of what I was talking about. And I was clueless as to whether what I was saying even made sense to whoever was listening. I�ve been through with my �counselor� and �advice-giving� days for so long already. I no longer know how to give advice to people since for me, life is already a personal choice. People make their own decisions and should live up to the consequences thereof. We can only do as much as tell them what we have to say about it. They�ll listen, but we can�t expect them to think the way we do. And with that philosophy in mind, I tenured my resignation from the �guidance� department so long ago.

When 3+1=4 Is An Equation That Could Take Forever To Analyze
I�m crying out loud here! Sometimes the things that you�re supposed to be happy about gives you the creeps. Or maybe it�s just me. Going to MB�s and on the way home, I was seated beside the person that gives me the same feeling as when I sneeze� makes my heart skip a beat. Weird analogy, but hey it�s true! To be smiling inside or to think of 3+1=4. In software engineering, risk analysis requires an understanding of history and experience from previous situations. In this case, I could say my CompE course has benefited me to this extent ONLY. Could this be the reason why some people quit the chase simply because they�re afraid that they would lose their friendship in the process? Now I know why someone once told me that it could happen. And now its me who�s feeling this way. This is not healthy talk, but I feel like defying the health dictates of the heart. Here�s something I�d like to hear from you people. When you�re alone with the person you feel so much affection for, you could have a nice conversation going and could simply have your minds speak as one, but when in the company of friends you just can�t say a thing or even walk an inch closer to the person. Why is it that before being more than friends you need to be friends first (literally obvious!), but once you�re friends it gets to that point where you�d stop to think whether you�d like to see the road ahead or not.

When your significant other does something nice for you like treating you to a movie, treating you for dessert or having some CDs burned just for you or simply texting you almost everyday or every other day, how do you know if that person is doing that because she�s just a nice, thoughtful friend or because she shares the same feeling as you do? And let�s say it�s the second case, assuming of course that she likes you back too, if you�re afraid to cross the line, it certainly isn�t nice to keep a lady waiting� am I right? As what my friend Faith said, it only takes one month before the giddy feeling fades to oblivion. Is this true? Kittin said one week only. Hehehe� And now, I see just that. It�s not like as it was before. Maybe she�s gone tired of thinking about it. I don�t wanna lose the person, but if I�d try to see the road ahead, maybe I�d really lose the person. But if I don�t maybe I�d still get to keep her. IF IF and more Ifs Wouldn�t want that person to be �The one that got away� *sigh. This sucks more than having to go to school every waking day. I�d appreciate your thoughts please.

Gotta do my software engineering powerpoint presentation for next week�s reporting. Thanks for reading btw.

Blogging from school again... haven't been here for a while. Was so happy yesterday 'coz we finally had a topic for our thesis, after weeks of brainstorming. Well, as usual, happiness was shortlived... (I'm getting used to it anyway). Today, we just learned that the ME team whom we are working the project with backed out since they are rather uneasy with Sir Morante as their adviser. I still have to talk to Carl Taguiam to reverse his decision. It's a very nice project that could benefit a farming community in Agusan. Our project was to develop a system that enables the farmers to plow a rice field even when the water level of the field is high. Its a very nice project... first of its kind... when a thesis would be handled simultaneously across 3 engineering fields... that's Computer Eng'g, Mechanical Eng'g and Civil Eng'g. Our advisers would be one from each department with panelists of 3 faculty members per department. I just hope Carl would continue... it's a very wonderful opportunity indeed. If not, then we'll have to continue with our neck-wrecking brainstorming sessions again. *sigh.

Only one thought keeps me smiling and jolly these days. Hope it won't be shortlived like the rest!

Gave my PC a facelift today. A virus has been blocking me from entering anti-virus sites. Finally got it fixed. Took me all afternoon to install softwares back to normal. I'm watching Formula 1 right now with my bro. Work and school again tomorrow. Looking forward already to Saturday! hahaha!

I'm blogging from school. Thank God it's Friday. My week's been a whirlwind... so full of vibrant color... happy and stressful moments. Balance, once again. I'm looking forward to tomorrow. Hopefully, I could just relax and not be thinking of too many things. *sigh! Anyway, wla lang ko lingaw ron... jst blogging, chattng and adding up some new found friends. Hi Lisa! Finally I get to know who you are. Kewl pics by the way! Is that Nokia HQ in Helsinki?

Today was a beautiful day. Today was proof that democracy still lives in this country... that Cebu is still a rather safe place to live... that Cebu can put up a wonderful show... sometimes even better than Manila's best... that our warm hospitality and beaches are definitely an aphrodisiac to our foreign guests.

This morning, I spent time watching Gloria's inaugural rites... on TV... from Quirino Grandstand to our Provincial Capitol. The Mercedes Limo with a single-plate-number of "1"... hehe... wish I had one like that too...*sigh

Today, I enjoyed watching Spiderman 2 with Leslie, Winnie, Diane, Rouselle and KenKen. The movie house was so full, we had to sit on the stairway. Les, thanks pala for the ticket! We had lots of fun afterwards, especially with the staff at Pizza Hut... I enjoyed every minute of it as we took to the last detail their Palm Card promo. Naughty Leslie! hahahaha! The funny part was how we ordered the pizzas at Pizza Hut and ended up eating them at the FoodCourt. We then had some desserts at Ice Monster. Manambok mi because of KENKEN!!! My significant other then treated me a bowl of Ice Monster's fruit toppings without me knowing until I was about to pay and then the cashier told me my dessert has already been paid. Nakakahiya, but I was smiling inside... It was one dessert I relished till the last piece of ice shaving... hahaha! Definitely tastes sweeter if it comes from the heart. hahaha! Next time, ako na naman mamangka, kay dili jud ni pwede nga ako lang malibrehan...

To my significant other... thank you for your constant thoughtfulness, sweetness and kindness! God bless you always! >o<

Surprise! Surprise! Damn, I still got it! It's funny how people can sometimes give you the information you'd need without actually fishing it from them. Hehe, maybe a little fishing... Wow! Now I know how shady some people could get. And they don't even have the face to do it themselves, they ask OTHERS to do it for them and instead play dumb. Ain't foolin me yo! Now I know why the term "hi skul batch black sheep" got coined. Hahaha! For a year, I've been curious why, but now I know! Sometimes I wonder whether I should be working in Lexmark or whether I could have a higher pay at a government agency at Langley!

It's a new layout. For lack of design time and ideas, I opted for a simple minimalist look that fits the theme. Did this hurriedly in just one hour before I went to bed. Life's been at a standstill since last week, so I guess when things are at static, you don't put in much, so there's the black design and a simple array of colors that notes that I am still reminded of the colors some people bring to my life despite the frustrations that beset me. I've been really busy for the past 2 months, and suddenly the project stops for a lame reason or no reason at all... and to think I was the one asked to fund the whole thing. So I know how a host feels as when his party-filled house is suddenly dispersed by some KJ policeofficers... hehehe... forgive me for the analogy... it's all I could think of.

Hello Mickie, Leslie, Lisa, Vanessa and Gary. It's nice to know that some people still blog. Shocked kayo nung wala akong post for a long time noh?? hehehe. It's so UN-me, pero naging busy lang talaga. I'll post more often now, since my life is slowly keeping up to pace na naman.

Yesterday was a very nice day. Was so happy with friends playing bowling and just digging for food at Ayala. Was also happy, thanks to the company of a special someone. hehehe... Nothing in this world is as precious as a smile!

Hmm... been very absent from this site. I was just so busy sorting out the many activities in my life. Been busy building a race car, which wasn't much appreciated, thanks to some feuding parties, whose history we knew nothing of. I mean, if two people are not in good terms, then what the f*ck*ng hell has that got to do with us asking help from the other party. I mean, we are students, and if we don't get the "support" that we were promised, then I guess we have enough initiative to ask someone's help, much more accept a helping hand that's generously been offered. geesh! Is that such a complicated thing to comprehend for some people who are of higher educational background as I am. It discourages me a lot from venturing out to higher degrees such as PhDs... or maybe there are just some out there who need to GROW UP!

Oh well, now I understand why the other party feels the same way as I do. At least, we share something in common... we don't stoop to the level of freaks like that... who are by the way are of higher level in terms of the academe, but when it comes to maturity... get a f*ck*ng LIFE!

We (my fellow OJT officemates and I), got our 4th salary today. Was so happy to receive it. It's so fulfilling to actually hold money that is YOURS TRULY, made from your own blood, sweat and *tears (of JOY)!... hehe.

So I'm back to blogging, since I've practically sorted my life's short turbulence. And now it's back to its static state. Been missing someone very much. So busy and with both of us working, it's almost impossible for us to keep up with the times. Maybe on Saturdays, but with thesis coming up, maybe a couple of hours off stress wouldn't hurt much for the heart. That's all for now, have to research some stuff for our project. It dreads me to be 5th year, with all the new things we need to learn, but in lieu of all the hassles, it definitely feels good to be months toward graduation. Can't wait to get out of this prison!

Enrolment tomorrow... seems like schooldays are ringing in once more. Gonna be busier than ever... *sigh. I have a June 26 deadline to beat. I hope I could finish the car in time.

Yesterday was Mom's birthday. Got out from work early to secretly fetch Mom's birthday cake from Shang. Had it specially done by their Pastry Chef mismo. The trip to and from their resort shuttle was arduous... with me holding the cake the whole time to protect it from the bumpiness of the road.

It was all worth it. Seeing mom amazed at how I pulled it through was really something. There are things in life that are simply borne out of wild ideas and split second precision. Simply priceless.

Today was one fruitful but tiring day. After Lexmark work, I was supposed to do work for our mobot, but I somehow found myself in an elementary school in Talamban carrying sacks of gravel and cement. Who would have thought!?!?! Another one of those spur-of-the-moment decisions my mind makes. Teammates of mine were going to TC and were deciding whether to do Robotics work or help Sir Maderazo with the construction of a classroom for the run-down school. And so I just told them that the afternoon would be best spent paving the classroom floor than tinkering on some motors. So we went to the construction site. Seeing my friends carry sacks of cement, I joined in, took off my shirt and loaded bag after bag on my shoulders. I just hope I won't wake up tomorrow morning with an aching back and shoulder. My hands hurt from the roughness of the sacks as we lifted them one by one and from the rough handle of the shovel we used to mix gravel and cement. GLOVES... better wear them tomorrow. Truly one big workout... one that's even beter than gym 'coz you get to actually build something with the energy you shell out.

So I'm here now at FUSELAGE blogging. Very nice place... 30 bucks for internet access with bottomless iced tea. Kinda worth it... not to mention the nice ambiance of the place. It's owned by my friend Blake Go and some of his friends. Hafta go now. Gotta go to AA's for Cippy Lu's birthday party.

My mind is so confused now. I'm given too many choices. When I'm given too few choices or no choice at all, I grumble. When given plenty, I can't seem to choose and wished that I only had one choice to take. Argh! My mind can't stop thinking, even if I think it's getting out of hand. Well that's life... filled with choices to make. But in the end, whatever and whichever path we choose, it somehow ends up for the best... even better than what we could have imagined. Take care peeps!

Thanks peeps for your comments on using signs as basis for a decision. I think it helped me in deciding that signs can often be true, but I guess instinct is a better measure. Well, as with any ordinary decision in life, one must choose, 'coz either way, you'd still be damned. Each choice has its own advantages as well as disadvantages, so what's really important is one's ability to handle the ramifications of ones decision. Now that I've made up my mind, I guess I'm happy to know that I've not encountered any of the consequences... yet. I hope it stays this way...

Hi Lisa! It's nice to get to travel to places... on company expense I suppose? hehehe... So what kind of work requires someone to travel all the way to Helsinki?

I'm designing a toy racing car. Never knew it would be this complicated to build from scratch. Oh well, work again tomorrow. The office is starting to bore me, and with the "zero below" temperature, all the more I'm tempted to sit on the job. I hope they could make work a bit more challenging. Well, better to have a job than have none. School opening's fast approaching, so maybe boring days will soon be over. Till here peeps... have to do some deep thinking on something else. Thanks again for your replies.

EARTH shook yesterday morn and just a few minutes ago.

Today was a long day. Word for the day: JEEPNEY.
Was able to ride in a jeep for a trip that spanned the entire route of jeep 62C from Pit-os to Carbon... to look for materials for our race car. It was a fun adventure. You'd me amused at our faces when we found the materials we were looking for (especially the brass rod). It was as if we struck oil!

I have something to ask of you peeps. Here's a poll. Here it is: When you are deciding on something important, do you ask for signs from up above to guide you in your decision (YES/NO) Please rate from 0 to 10 on how much you rely on it as a factor in making your decision (0-10 with 10 as highest).

You might ask why am I having a poll here for the first time. Well, we're in a democracy... I suppose and... well, something happened two days ago which was quite distracting and it sort of made me think alot about what the hidden message behind "signs"... or maybe I'm just paranoid. Anyway, take the poll and it will help me decide. Thanks. Till here peeps, 'coz have to sleep so I can wake up for a busy day tomorrow.

Sorry if I haven't been bloggin much. I'll try to post frequently.... have to fix this darn PC at home. My Internet Explorer is busted... got hit by a virus which disables me from using my proxy server and I try to fix it by downloading the hotfixes at Microsoft.com, but the darn virus blocks me from Microsoft.com... whoever made this virus is a nutcase. I can only surf with Netscape, but Microsoft has a way of not allowing Netscape to view their sites... or at least make it difficult to access. Darn Bill Gates! My new PC is coming... be patient John, be patient.

As for me, busy at work. I'm starting to enjoy my work again. Few more weeks to go and classes na naman... don't wanna go to school na... I wanna work and be taught only Robotics stuff in school. Minor subjects are a sure waste of income-generating time. ANyway, have to go 'coz my break is now OVER!

Where are the people I know nowadays?... are they hiding from terrorists???

Wow! Blogger has a new GUI. So I've posted 341 posts na pala... kewl! This thing looks nice.

I casted my first vote this morning as early as 7AM. It's good to vote early in the morning. No queues at all, few "leaflet-giving" people and the atmosphere is more conducive for voting wisely. I hope the candidate I voted for the presidential seat wins. Though he's not on the top of the surveys, but who cares about surveys. What's important is that I'm free enough to vote who I think could best serve the interests of the nation.

After casting my vote with my family and relatives, we went home and I went back to sleep. From lunch till now, I was playing a game in my PC. Work resumes tomorrow and it's 7:30 for me. See ya peeps.

Election will already be tomorrow. God help us all!!!

It will be my first time to vote. I've already made my "kodigo" (*shhhh???) as to who among the candidates I will be voting for. Have to wake up early tomorrow to beat the lines. I hope it won't be a very hot day tomorrow. After casting my vote, probably I'll just stay home to get back to sleep and do some gardening late in the afternoon. No work tomorrow, so I guess it would be a good time to relax from all the stress work has to offer.

The campaign season is over and may the best candidate win. I hope for a peaceful election... without cheating and post-election violence. The future of our nation lies in our votes. May we vote wisely.

Now recovering from yesterday's fever. Got out from the below zero degree office into the very hot road... walked to Ayala and entered the cold mall... and then decided to watch Peter Pan (I believe in fairies, I do, I do...) to kill time and so entered the extremely freezing empty cinema. So when I got out, the only thing I could feel is hot hot hot... eyes burning, head throbbing and chills running down my spine.

Half day from work... hate it when that happens. Means lesser pay and I get to spend more to kill time... like this one I'm doing.

I'm now at Ayala.

Blogging... yes... at Metro Cafe... cheaper to blog here.

Vote for Ping Lacson. Grocery lines will get shorter, or even non-existent. And if you drive a car, you should vote for him all the more. No traffic at all. And the Philippines will be less populated and we will have more resources to share. Ain't that paradise! So sa Mayo Diyes, vote Ping Lacson. Buo ang loob, walang takot. This is not a paid advertisement by the way. Blog service is free.

Don't take it seriously, it's just a joke... or is it?

My OJT work is fine, but how I wish they could teach us more stuff... this is not CompE stuff... anyone with a brain could do this... even toddlers can... REALLY! If this is how the work world is, then it surely sucks and I'd rather stay stuck up in school. But what the heck, at least it keeps me busy and the siomai sold during breaktime is definitely something we look forward to.

And I'm now lost for words. And Raine, if you're reading this, a tagboard would look good for your site.

Hmmm... still 45 minutes from my log off... gotta make my 25 pesos sulit... so... hmmm... I'll just do some surf'n and check'n emails and Friendster and...

If everyday's like this, I better go straight home after work to water the plants and maybe feed and play with my 3 dogs and perhaps repair the dilapidated crumbling house.

And as usual watch the ABS CBN shows from 9PM to 10PM and sleep to another early Lexmark morning.

That's been my day since I ventured out to this joint. Routine is so boring. Get me out of this!!!

Tuesday's Post
Work again (as usual) at 8AM. Got busy as more loads of work are given to us. My boss asked us to do overtime in the afternoon, but because of yesterday's half-day work, I thought it would be a trend for the week and so I committed myself to watching a movie with Rouselle at 11. And so I just promised my boss to return to work at 3:00. So instead of 1:00 to 5:00, I worked from 3 to 7, just in time for the video conference at 7:30 with our Lexmark counterparts in the U.S.

And so at 11:30, I rushed from the office to the just-nearby Ayala Center. Was kinda late (sorry Selle) 'coz I had to talk to my boss, who was kind enough to allow me to have an extra long lunch break. 'Twas a good thing my request could be accomodated on short notice since my boss who is a SHE also had other engagements for the afternoon, and since she didn't have much work for us in the afternoon and since afternoon work is overtime work (thus not obligatory), I was able to extend it till 3PM.

Love Actually was a nice movie. Love actually is everywhere... hmmm... 'Twas a British movie so I definitely loved the dialogues in British accent! And with British accent comes actors like Hugh Grant and what's his name... forgot. They could have also put Hugh Jackman to be part of the cast... but well, at least they placed Rowan Atkinson there... who showed his face for barely 10 minutes of film... hehe. My jaw went wide open at the character Juliet... I think the actress' name is Keira Knightley... she's so pretty! Newest IDOL!!! The film is one that I would call a Happy Film. Happy films are those that give you happy thoughts and make you feel good and feel as if the world is still perfect as you exit the movie house... kinda like adding endorphins directly to your brain... hehe

It was a nice movie experience with my movie mate Rouselle. During the movie, the scenes of London by Christmas made us talk about her would-be migration to the US in a year's time... unless of course she gets to find a reason to stay in this God-forsaken land where movie actors get to be elected president. Hahaha!... no pun intended. Maybe after graduation and if Lexmark would absorb me to their workforce then perhaps we could meet again in the U.S. during our Lexmark Training at Lexington, Kentucky... hmmm. I could probably not return here and instead work at the Lexmark Headquarters in Lexington. That would be a nice plan for the year to come... I guess that could clear my confusion as to what to do or to be after graduation. No more teaching for me... masters program could be "care-of-company expense" and as to the rest, what could the dollar not pay for... right? Hmmm... Chicago and Kentucky couldn't be that far... I guess.

Wednesday's Post
I was out from work at 5PM. Had to do overtime to keep work from piling up. Wasn't able to attend Marie's birthday treat at La Mare and bowling at Bowlingplex at 3, 'coz naturally I was busy enjoying my work. So at 5, I went to the mall to buy Marie a bag at Girbaud, the cost of which was split by all the guys in the barkada. Hehe... sorry but during summer vacation, budget is rather tight. We then had dinner at Roma Mia Pizza at Ayala, Jed's treat. Jed's birthday is today April 29 and Marie's will be tomorrow. They sorta did a double birthday bash. Lendel attemted did a practical joke which wasn really funny to us but not to Adrian. He tried to bump Adrian who was in the way of the parking spot. Bump a little supposed to be, but the LITTLE bump turned to a "ran over" when Lendel was unable to control the automatic-shift Pajero... resulting in the front wheel sideswiping Adrian's left leg... causing him to limp the whole time... from the bowling activity to dinner to our hangout at Bo's Banilad. Hahaha! A ran-over rat! I dunno if it's something to laugh at, but I just can't help laugh at the stupid bloopers some people could make themselves do.

I'll post something later after office time, since my short break is now up.